by Benjamin Marks, Economics.org.au editor-in-chief

Another week and another two defences of government intervention in schooling from the CIS and IPA, who claim they are free market think tanks.

CIS research fellow Jennifer Buckingham says, “Schools have a powerful role in society and should assume responsibility not just for scholastic learning but also for moulding good citizens. That is, after all, why education is publicly funded — it advances the public good” (p. 28). No attempt to define “public good” is made. Doesn’t successful business advance the public good? Therefore, it must follow that business should be subsidised. How about good newspapers? They serve an educational purpose and are in the interests of the public good. Therefore, we should subsidise newspapers, give the editors a curriculum of points to get across, ensure we’ve trained all the journalists in our teaching methods and on it goes. Genius. Lets stick our logo on it, turn it into a PDF and send out a press release.

IPA research fellow Julie Novak says, “Reducing public funding by the amount envisaged by the Greens would restrict the choice of nongovernment schooling to all but the wealthiest Australian parents.” I guess restricting government subsidies in healthcare, transport and apprenticeships would do the same. Who are the socialists: the Greens or the IPA?

How can the CIS and IPA be so blind to the fact that schools in Australia are non-market entities? Government enforces attendance (you must attend somewhere they approve), financing (at varying rates) and curriculum. Compulsory attendance is synonymous with kidnapping, compulsory financing is synonymous with theft and compulsory curriculum is most closely synonymous with brainwashing or indoctrination, although perhaps those terms are too generous to the stupidity of students.

Hey Mr government school supporter, answer this: can I steal your children off you, only for about six hours a day, so that I can teach them what I know is best for them? You won’t have to pay (directly) for it, you won’t need to do anything but send them away, and I’ll do the rest. Along with the help of the expert panel of educators I have employed and approved of, I will make your child a tip-top citizen. Don’t worry, you don’t need to answer, it’s a rhetorical question, you don’t really have a choice, I’m going to take your kids away from you no matter what you think, for your own good, of course.

I am well-meaning, have majority support within my jurisdiction and even have a constitution that no one signed. I don’t think I’ve left anything out. I thank in advance the CIS and IPA for their apologetics and support in my service to the public good and cause of free markets. Maybe they’ll ask me to speak at their next conference or fund-raiser.