Other entries featuring Bert Kelly»

Bert KellyThe Bulletin, January 13, 1981, p. 91.

When the Women’s Liberation ladies first raised their lovely heads when I was in parliament, I used to get into a state of blind panic when they savaged me. This they were always likely to do because I was, and indeed still am, a dull plodding arch conservative. It did not take the liberation ladies long to find this out and before each election they used to put me at the top of their dishonour roll.

I expected that Mavis would get upset about this, but it did not seem to worry her at all. Mine was a rural electorate whose constituents were suspicious of change and she knew that my women were even more conservative than my men. Mavis admitted to me, in the privacy of our conjugal cot, that she would have been much more concerned if the WEL ladies had thought well of me.

It was for this kind of reason that I dismissed rather too light-heartedly the activities of a similar movement, the Animal Liberation Lobby. I have been told that this organisation is mainly made up of ladies from Sydney and Melbourne who haven’t got enough to do. So to fill in their time and to give themselves a cause to be angry about, they have formed themselves into an association to care for animals.

I would have thought that they would have joined the RSPCA which has, for years, been caring for animals in a wise way, but evidently the animal libbers felt that the RSPCA was too timid and not pugnacious enough to care for animals in the way that the libbers yearned to do. So they broke away and formed a more radical organisation.

Not all their published objectives are foolish; indeed some are sensibly sensitive to the sufferings of animals. I admit that I sometimes need a hard slap on the wrist to keep my animal caring conscience alive and kicking. But some of the libbers’ objectives are silly, so silly as to expose the organisation to ridicule. This seems to be a fate suffered by other well-meaning, misty-eyed groups. For instance, the fair cause of conservation has been greatly damaged by the activities of its more fanatical adherents. I again recommend that you read A Voice in the Wilderness, by Allan May.

I said that some of the Animal Liberation objectives were silly. One is that all desexing of animals must be done by a vet! Just imagine lamb marking! The vet would probably use his teeth the same as we do or would he have to use a local anaesthetic?

Another libber objective is that all transported animals must be unloaded after being carried 100 kilometres and then reloaded. It is hard to imagine anything as silly as this. I suppose they think sheep just love climbing in and out of transports!

I thought for a while that these foolishnesses would expose the libbers to so much ridicule that they would never surface again. But now I am not sure. These kinds of organisations seem to attract quite surprising support, particularly from city dwellers. Fred tells me that rats, when closely confined in large numbers, go a bit mad and he believes that people in big cities go the same way. “The more they are together, the sillier they will be,” he tells me.

Recently I attended a meeting of farmers, scientists and other interested people to discuss how to keep the animal libbers at bay. It was a one-sided discussion because speaker after speaker got stuck into the libbers who were not there to defend themselves. But the president of our State branch of the RSPCA brought a bit of balance to the meeting. He pointed out that the RSPCA had too much experience and sense to go haring off after impossible objectives, but nevertheless there were many reasons why farmers should be continually questioned on their animal care practices. Then the president said that, because the RSPCA had not joined the libbers in their sillier suggestions, it was now suddenly being regarded with more affectation and respect than it had recently received from farmers. He added, rather whimsically, that this sudden change of attitude reminded him of the way a lapsed Catholic suddenly discovers his belief in the efficacy of prayer if he is suddenly in peril in a storm at sea!

This touched many of us on the raw. It will not help us to sit back hoping that the animal libbers will go away. They may indeed be a bit queer, but there are a lot of queer people about. One thing we farmers should do would be to renew our lapsed subscriptions to the RSPCA. At least these people can hit the libbers with their halo, which is more than we can do. And from now on we will have to be on our guard. The RSL motto, “the price of liberty is eternal vigilance,” is something we should remember ourselves.

(in order of appearance on Economics.org.au)
  1. Bert Kelly on Journalism
  2. Move for a body of Modest Members
  3. Modest Members Association
  4. Bert Kelly's Maiden Parliamentary Speech
  5. Government Intervention
  6. 1976 Monday Conference transcript featuring Bert Kelly
  7. Petrol for Farmers
  8. Some Sacred Cows
  9. Experiences in Parliament
  10. Spending your Money
  11. Who needs literary licence?
  12. A touch of Fred's anarchy
  13. Supply and Demand
  14. Bert Kelly on Disaster Relief
  15. Bert Kelly Wants to Secede
  16. Under Labor, is working hard foolish?
  17. An Idiot's Guide to Interventionism
  18. Bert Kelly Destroys the Side Benefits Argument for Government
  19. Bert Kelly gets his head around big-headed bird-brained politics
  20. First Modest Member (Bert Kelly) AFR Column
  21. Second Modest Member (Bert Kelly) AFR Column
  22. Third Modest Member (Bert Kelly) AFR Column
  23. Fourth Modest Member (Bert Kelly) AFR Column
  24. Fifth Modest Member (Bert Kelly) AFR Column
  25. Sixth Modest Member (Bert Kelly) AFR Column
  26. Bert Kelly on the 2011 Budget and Australia's Pathetic Journalists and Politicians
  27. Bert Kelly, Bastard or Simple Sod?
  28. Liberal Backbencher Hits Govt. Over Import Restrictions
  29. Bert Kelly feels a dam coming on at each election
  30. Bert Kelly Enters Parliament
  31. Why take in one another's washing?
  32. Bert Kelly breaks the law, disrespects government and enjoys it
  33. Gillard's galley-powered waterskiing
  34. Can price control really work?
  35. Should we put up with socialism?
  36. We're quick to get sick of socialism
  37. Time the protection racket ended
  38. Can't pull the wool over Farmer Fred
  39. People not Politics
  40. Bert Kelly admits he should have had less faith in politicians
  41. Labor: a girl who couldn't say no
  42. Why leading businessmen carry black briefcases
  43. Ludwig von Mises on page 3 of AFR
  44. Mavis wants the Modest Member to dedicate his book to her
  45. Time to Butcher "Aussie Beef"
  46. Bert Kelly reviews The War Diaries of Weary Dunlop
  47. Bert Kelly reviews We Were There
  48. Tariffs get the fork-tongue treatment
  49. Bert Kelly reduces government to its absurdities
  50. Politician sacrifices his ... honesty
  51. It's all a matter of principle
  52. Bert Kelly Destroys the Infant Industry Argument
  53. Bert Kelly Untangles Tariff Torment
  54. Bert Kelly resorts to prayer
  55. Eccles keeps our nose hard down on the tariff grindstone
  56. "Don't you believe in protecting us against imports from cheap labour countries?"
  57. Even if lucky, we needn't be stupid
  58. Great "freedom of choice" mystery
  59. Small government's growth problem
  60. Tariffs Introduced
  61. More About Tariffs
  62. Sacred cow kicker into print
  63. Modest Member must not give up
  64. Traditional Wheat Farming is Our Birthright and Heritage and Must be Protected!
  65. Bert Kelly brilliantly defends "theoretical academics"
  66. The Society of Modest Members
  67. John Hyde's illogical, soft, complicated, unfocussed and unsuccessful attempt to communicate why he defends markets
  68. Modesty ablaze
  69. Case for ministers staying home
  70. The unusual self-evident simplicity of the Modest Members Society
  71. Animal lib the new scourge of the bush
  72. The Association for the Prevention of Cruelty to Krill
  73. Repeal economic laws, force people to buy new cars and enforce tariffs against overseas tennis players
  74. Thoughts on how to kill dinosaurs
  75. Let's try the chill winds
  76. Taking the Right's road
  77. Bert Kelly: "I did not try often or hard enough"
  78. Bert Kelly "lacked ... guts and wisdom"
  79. A look at life without tariffs
  80. The Gospel according to Bert
  81. Tiny note on Bert Kelly's column in The Bulletin in 1985
  82. Why costs can't be guaranteed
  83. Hitting out with a halo
  84. Paying farmers not to grow crops will save on subsidies, revenge tariffs, etc
  85. "The Modest Farmer joins us" | "How The Modest Farmer came to be"
  86. Bert Kelly Destroys the Freeloading Justifies Government Argument
  87. Government Intervention
    vs
    Government Interference
  88. Bigger Cake = Bigger Slices
  89. Bert Kelly on the Political Process
  90. Charabanc: Part 1
  91. Charabanc: Part 2
  92. Charabanc: Part 3
  93. Relationships with the Liberal Party
  94. Tariffs = High Prices + World War
  95. Bert Kelly's Family History
  96. Bert Kelly's Pre-Parliament Life
  97. Why Bert Kelly was not even more publicly outspoken
  98. WEATHER IS USUALLY UNUSUAL
  99. How to stand aside when it's time to be counted
  100. How the Modest Member went back to being a Modest Farmer
  101. My pearls of wisdom were dull beyond belief
  102. Bert Kelly on Political Football
  103. Ross Gittins Wins Bert Kelly Award
  104. Interesting 1964 Bert Kelly speech: he says he is not a free trader and that he supports protection!
  105. This is the wall the Right built
  106. Has Santa socked it to car makers?
  107. Is the Budget a cargo cult?
  108. Will we end up subsidising one another?
  109. Do we want our money to fly?
  110. Can a bear be sure of a feed?
  111. How to impress your MP -
    ambush him
  112. The time for being nice to our MPs has gone ...
  113. Don't feel sorry for him -
    hang on to his ear
  114. Trade wars can easily end up on a battlefield
  115. Tariffs Create Unemployment
  116. Bert Kelly recommends Ayn Rand
  117. Bert Kelly's Satirical Prophecy: Minister for Meteorology (tick) and High Protectionist Policies to Result in War Yet Again (?)
  118. Bert Kelly in 1972 on Foreign Ownership of Australian Farmland and Warren Truss, Barnaby Joyce and Bill Heffernan in 2012
  119. Parliament a place for pragmatists
  120. Of Sugar Wells and Think-Tanks
  121. Bert Kelly: "I must take some of the blame"
  122. A Modest Farmer looks at the Problems of Structural Change
  123. Government Fails Spectacularly
  124. Know your proper place if you want the quiet life
  125. Bert Kelly on political speech writers
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