Bert Kelly, The Bulletin, January 13, 1981, p. 91.
When the Women’s Liberation ladies first raised their lovely heads when I was in parliament, I used to get into a state of blind panic when they savaged me. This they were always likely to do because I was, and indeed still am, a dull plodding arch conservative. It did not take the liberation ladies long to find this out and before each election they used to put me at the top of their dishonour roll.
I expected that Mavis would get upset about this, but it did not seem to worry her at all. Mine was a rural electorate whose constituents were suspicious of change and she knew that my women were even more conservative than my men. Mavis admitted to me, in the privacy of our conjugal cot, that she would have been much more concerned if the WEL ladies had thought well of me.
It was for this kind of reason that I dismissed rather too light-heartedly the activities of a similar movement, the Animal Liberation Lobby. I have been told that this organisation is mainly made up of ladies from Sydney and Melbourne who haven’t got enough to do. So to fill in their time and to give themselves a cause to be angry about, they have formed themselves into an association to care for animals.
I would have thought that they would have joined the RSPCA which has, for years, been caring for animals in a wise way, but evidently the animal libbers felt that the RSPCA was too timid and not pugnacious enough to care for animals in the way that the libbers yearned to do. So they broke away and formed a more radical organisation.
Not all their published objectives are foolish; indeed some are sensibly sensitive to the sufferings of animals. I admit that I sometimes need a hard slap on the wrist to keep my animal caring conscience alive and kicking. But some of the libbers’ objectives are silly, so silly as to expose the organisation to ridicule. This seems to be a fate suffered by other well-meaning, misty-eyed groups. For instance, the fair cause of conservation has been greatly damaged by the activities of its more fanatical adherents. I again recommend that you read A Voice in the Wilderness, by Allan May.
I said that some of the Animal Liberation objectives were silly. One is that all desexing of animals must be done by a vet! Just imagine lamb marking! The vet would probably use his teeth the same as we do or would he have to use a local anaesthetic?
Another libber objective is that all transported animals must be unloaded after being carried 100 kilometres and then reloaded. It is hard to imagine anything as silly as this. I suppose they think sheep just love climbing in and out of transports!
I thought for a while that these foolishnesses would expose the libbers to so much ridicule that they would never surface again. But now I am not sure. These kinds of organisations seem to attract quite surprising support, particularly from city dwellers. Fred tells me that rats, when closely confined in large numbers, go a bit mad and he believes that people in big cities go the same way. “The more they are together, the sillier they will be,” he tells me.
Recently I attended a meeting of farmers, scientists and other interested people to discuss how to keep the animal libbers at bay. It was a one-sided discussion because speaker after speaker got stuck into the libbers who were not there to defend themselves. But the president of our State branch of the RSPCA brought a bit of balance to the meeting. He pointed out that the RSPCA had too much experience and sense to go haring off after impossible objectives, but nevertheless there were many reasons why farmers should be continually questioned on their animal care practices. Then the president said that, because the RSPCA had not joined the libbers in their sillier suggestions, it was now suddenly being regarded with more affectation and respect than it had recently received from farmers. He added, rather whimsically, that this sudden change of attitude reminded him of the way a lapsed Catholic suddenly discovers his belief in the efficacy of prayer if he is suddenly in peril in a storm at sea!
This touched many of us on the raw. It will not help us to sit back hoping that the animal libbers will go away. They may indeed be a bit queer, but there are a lot of queer people about. One thing we farmers should do would be to renew our lapsed subscriptions to the RSPCA. At least these people can hit the libbers with their halo, which is more than we can do. And from now on we will have to be on our guard. The RSL motto, “the price of liberty is eternal vigilance,” is something we should remember ourselves.
- Bert Kelly on Journalism
- Move for a body of Modest Members
- Modest Members Association
- Bert Kelly's Maiden Parliamentary Speech
- Government Intervention
- 1976 Monday Conference transcript featuring Bert Kelly
- Petrol for Farmers
- Some Sacred Cows
- Experiences in Parliament
- Spending your Money
- Who needs literary licence?
- A touch of Fred's anarchy
- Supply and Demand
- Bert Kelly on Disaster Relief
- Bert Kelly Wants to Secede
- Under Labor, is working hard foolish?
- An Idiot's Guide to Interventionism
- Bert Kelly Destroys the Side Benefits Argument for Government
- Bert Kelly gets his head around big-headed bird-brained politics
- First Modest Member (Bert Kelly) AFR Column
- Second Modest Member (Bert Kelly) AFR Column
- Third Modest Member (Bert Kelly) AFR Column
- Fourth Modest Member (Bert Kelly) AFR Column
- Fifth Modest Member (Bert Kelly) AFR Column
- Sixth Modest Member (Bert Kelly) AFR Column
- Bert Kelly on the 2011 Budget and Australia's Pathetic Journalists and Politicians
- Bert Kelly, Bastard or Simple Sod?
- Liberal Backbencher Hits Govt. Over Import Restrictions
- Bert Kelly feels a dam coming on at each election
- Bert Kelly Enters Parliament
- Why take in one another's washing?
- Bert Kelly breaks the law, disrespects government and enjoys it
- Gillard's galley-powered waterskiing
- Can price control really work?
- Should we put up with socialism?
- We're quick to get sick of socialism
- Time the protection racket ended
- Can't pull the wool over Farmer Fred
- People not Politics
- Bert Kelly admits he should have had less faith in politicians
- Labor: a girl who couldn't say no
- Why leading businessmen carry black briefcases
- Ludwig von Mises on page 3 of AFR
- Mavis wants the Modest Member to dedicate his book to her
- Time to Butcher "Aussie Beef"
- Bert Kelly reviews The War Diaries of Weary Dunlop
- Bert Kelly reviews We Were There
- Tariffs get the fork-tongue treatment
- Bert Kelly reduces government to its absurdities
- Politician sacrifices his ... honesty
- It's all a matter of principle
- Bert Kelly Destroys the Infant Industry Argument
- Bert Kelly Untangles Tariff Torment
- Bert Kelly resorts to prayer
- Eccles keeps our nose hard down on the tariff grindstone
- "Don't you believe in protecting us against imports from cheap labour countries?"
- Even if lucky, we needn't be stupid
- Great "freedom of choice" mystery
- Small government's growth problem
- Tariffs Introduced
- More About Tariffs
- Sacred cow kicker into print
- Modest Member must not give up
- Traditional Wheat Farming is Our Birthright and Heritage and Must be Protected!
- Bert Kelly brilliantly defends "theoretical academics"
- The Society of Modest Members
- John Hyde's illogical, soft, complicated, unfocussed and unsuccessful attempt to communicate why he defends markets
- Modesty ablaze
- Case for ministers staying home
- The unusual self-evident simplicity of the Modest Members Society
- Animal lib the new scourge of the bush
- The Association for the Prevention of Cruelty to Krill
- Repeal economic laws, force people to buy new cars and enforce tariffs against overseas tennis players
- Thoughts on how to kill dinosaurs
- Let's try the chill winds
- Taking the Right's road
- Bert Kelly: "I did not try often or hard enough"
- Bert Kelly "lacked ... guts and wisdom"
- A look at life without tariffs
- The Gospel according to Bert
- Tiny note on Bert Kelly's column in The Bulletin in 1985
- Why costs can't be guaranteed
- Hitting out with a halo
- Paying farmers not to grow crops will save on subsidies, revenge tariffs, etc
- "The Modest Farmer joins us" | "How The Modest Farmer came to be"
- Bert Kelly Destroys the Freeloading Justifies Government Argument
- Government Intervention
vs
Government Interference - Bigger Cake = Bigger Slices
- Bert Kelly on the Political Process
- Charabanc: Part 1
- Charabanc: Part 2
- Charabanc: Part 3
- Relationships with the Liberal Party
- Tariffs = High Prices + World War
- Bert Kelly's Family History
- Bert Kelly's Pre-Parliament Life
- Why Bert Kelly was not even more publicly outspoken
- WEATHER IS USUALLY UNUSUAL
- How to stand aside when it's time to be counted
- How the Modest Member went back to being a Modest Farmer
- My pearls of wisdom were dull beyond belief
- Bert Kelly on Political Football
- Ross Gittins Wins Bert Kelly Award
- Interesting 1964 Bert Kelly speech: he says he is not a free trader and that he supports protection!
- This is the wall the Right built
- Has Santa socked it to car makers?
- Is the Budget a cargo cult?
- Will we end up subsidising one another?
- Do we want our money to fly?
- Can a bear be sure of a feed?
- How to impress your MP -
ambush him - The time for being nice to our MPs has gone ...
- Don't feel sorry for him -
hang on to his ear - Trade wars can easily end up on a battlefield
- Tariffs Create Unemployment
- Bert Kelly recommends Ayn Rand
- Bert Kelly's Satirical Prophecy: Minister for Meteorology (tick) and High Protectionist Policies to Result in War Yet Again (?)
- Bert Kelly in 1972 on Foreign Ownership of Australian Farmland and Warren Truss, Barnaby Joyce and Bill Heffernan in 2012
- Parliament a place for pragmatists
- Of Sugar Wells and Think-Tanks
- Bert Kelly: "I must take some of the blame"
- A Modest Farmer looks at the Problems of Structural Change
- Government Fails Spectacularly
- Know your proper place if you want the quiet life
- Bert Kelly on political speech writers
Benjamin Marks
October 14, 2011 @ 5:56 pm
This article was referenced and continued by Bert Kelly a few months later in “Are whales cruel to kill krill?” The Bulletin, April 7, 1981, p. 108, available on Economics.org.au as “The Association for the Prevention of Cruelty to Krill.”